Deepening our Christianity

the Monday Newsletter of Paul Prins

Edition #15 · 21 August 2023

Blessings Reader,

Who are We?

It is hard to know ourselves. What version of ourselves is truly who we are? Is it the version of ourselves when things are going our way, or who we are when it feels like our soul might fall out of our chest?

We live in aspirational cultures. There are streams of power, persona, and excess that flow before and through us. Our cultures define the boundaries of our possibilities. I will note that many things are far easier when we have excess, power, and a curated persona. That these are so pervasive that our conceptions of true self depend on them. That our character isn't truly who we are when we're lacking. Our culture is often ready to excuse behavior because someone was under duress. At least for people seen as powerful and with lives of excess.

Yet, what if we accept that it is really a show and a front. That it is actually hard to see ourselves clearly. Much of our lives are spent erecting layers of filters that project outward while confusing our inward gaze. The very things that our culture elevates for our identities and survival cloud our eyes from ourselves.

What if, instead, we needed to empty ourselves? To see who we are may only be possible amidst hunger and exhaustion. That who I am exists outside of others, and without comparison to anyone but Jesus. That our character is most true amidst the strain and grinding of our lives. Are we still gracious? How quick are we to a place of grace and do we still look like we imagined ourselves? When our health falters and death looms - do we still entrust our spirit to the Lord? When we are the verge of being overcome and crushed - will we be slow to anger and quick to forgiveness? How much more do those with excess who lack the character of Jesus condemn themselves?

Seeing the divide between who I am and who I want to be gives me a chance. A chance to be honest. A chance to let our character grow. To become something more than the ease we may have built into our lives. So that when the hardness of life returns, we might find ourselves with more grace, mercy, hope, and love. Just like Jesus.

Until Next Week

Posted since the last Edition

A Prayer in Anguish – Translating Psalm 143

Crushed, pursued, and half dead, this psalmist cries out to a God who is not responding. While falling into the grave, they still believe.
~5 Minutes

Read the Reflection

A Confident Prayer for Refuge – Translating Psalm 31

This psalm flows out of the lived internal experience of the psalmist. We get to look out through their eyes, and feel through their body the swings from hope, to despair, through to praise.
~6 Minutes

Read the Reflection

Unpublished Photo for this Edition

I often wake up in the early hours of the morning, a few hours after going to bed. Sometimes it is right at the cusp of dawn. Last Tuesday, I decided to take some photos from our balcony in the morning twilight.
**Captured:** 15 August 2023

Curated Goods just for You

Sharing what I've come across from around the internet that may encourage or help you.

Nothing this week.
I was sick for a good portion of the week and didn't read much.

A Prayer for the Week to Come

Lord, place within my heart an unquenchable desire to be like you. To see myself transformed against the grain and flow of my culture and world. Give me the courage to fast and to empty myself. Give me the compassion I will need to see who I am and the trust in you that you are with me in becoming more like you. To respond like Jesus with grace, mercy, hope, and love out of my lack.